Jehovah's Witnesses ONLY: possible that i am just not cut out for the truth? so is my life meaningless?

I believe the questions you are asking is that you want to know the truth, you have a feeling that the watch tower organisation isn;t being honest with you, try reading the Bible with out the watchtower commentories and you will see that it is all about Gods love for us and the plan He laid out to save us, through Jesus, He is the way ,The truth and the light no one can come to God exept through Jesus, Jesus words are I and the Father are one, God sacrificed Himself as Jesus to save us John 3:16